November 7, 2004
The
beloved young man who designed and sold last year's popular
Limited Edition Pub-Sprawl T-Shirts, Leonardo Larson, is
facing imprisonment of up to five years, disgorgement of
his alleged illegal earnings, and disbarment for insider
trading.
"Plus, we also want him to stop making t-shirts,"
the Chairman of the Securities and Exchange Commission,
William H. Donaldson, added. "That will be the hardest
to do, getting him to stop making t-shirts, because there's
really no basis in securities law that allows such equitable
based relief."
But that won't stop them from trying. The Securities and
Exchange Commission has filed a complaint alleging Leonardo
engaged in insider trading at two Chicago companies, including
a company where he was the manager of investor relations,
to illegally gain $285,500.
"It's a load of crap," says Leonardo's attorney,
Bud Dickenson. "We're going to take this f---ing SEC
and nail it to the wall! Who the hell do they think they
are? I've never heard of them! When I'm done with this case,
the SEC bastards won't even know what hit them! That's how
good of an attorney I am, dammit!"
On Feb. 10, the SEC filed a complaint in the U.S. District
Court for the Northern District of Chicago against Leonardo,
alleging that between March 2004 and December 2004, Larson,
who was then a manager of investor relations for Chicago-based
"Wee T-Shirts, Inc.," ("WET-SHIRTS")
(NASDAQ: 36DD), engaged in insider trading in options for
securities of WET-SHIRTS and of Chicago-based Concurrent
Computer Corp. (NASDAQ: CCUR), which had some strange sort
of business relationship with WET-SHIRTS.
The
complaint also alleges that to carry out the scheme, Leonardo
placed orders to trade in a brokerage account in the name
of his father, Steve "Jobs" Larson, over the Internet
using an Apple IIe computer at WET-SHIRTS and by telephone.
At the time, Leonardo was a resident of Chicago, while his
father lived near Brussels, Belgium, although he thought
it was Indiana at the time.
The SEC further alleges Leonardo was intimately involved
in the preparation of WET-SHIRTS quarterly earnings releases,
from which he obtained highly sensitive and detailed nonpublic
information after the end of each quarter, and through the
date and time of each quarterly earnings release.
"This is a preposterous allegation," Dickenson
stated at a press conference on behalf of Larson. "Everyone
knows my client has never been intimately involved in anything
in his entire life. The record shows this and I intend to
prove this beyond a preponderance of a shadow of any reasonable
doubt, so help me God!"
When asked if he believed in God, Dickenson replied, "Don't
get me started!"
The SEC complaint also alleges Leonardo received material
nonpublic information regarding publicly traded companies
that WET-SHIRTS had proposed business transactions such
as investments, acquisitions, mergers and significant vendor
relationships. While in possession of this nonpublic information,
the complaint alleges that Leonardo conducted securities
trades in his own brokerage account, which included various
purchases and sales of WET-SHIRTS and Concurrent options.
As a result, he illegally gained at least $285,505.
After
Leonardo's final sale, Leonardo started instructions that
caused virtually all of the funds in his brokerage account
to be transferred outside of the United States, and was
therefore enriched by that amount.
The SEC wants a permanent injunction, accounting, disgorgement,
prejudgment interest, civil penalties and an officer and
director bar against Leonardo.
"Only then will Leonardo Larson fully pay for his
inside crimes against trading," stated Chairman Donaldson.
"I don't care if he made what one critic called the
'Mona Lisa of Pubcrawl T-Shirts,' Leonardo is not above
the law."
"My client will be vindicated," Dickenson promised
through clenched teeth. "But will the SEC be vindicated?
That, you see, is the real question. Because I can tell
you this now, it won't! It won't, I say!"
Insider trading, unlike beastiality, is not a crime against
nature. Insider trading refers generally to buying or selling
a security, in breach of a fiduciary duty or other relationship
of trust and confidence, while in possession of material,
nonpublic information about the security. Insider trading
violations may also include "tipping" such information,
securities trading by the person "tipped," and
securities trading by those who misappropriate such information.
To learn more, or to learn how to do your own insider
trading without getting caught, visit www.sec.gov.
Pub-Sprawl correspondent Mary Ratchet and Stephen
Bolinski contributed to this report.
